Good memory when I was a teenager: I went to the local grocery store, Meijer (similar to Smith’s or Harmons). I heard my name over the PA system. “Would Aaron Sha-fuh-wall-uff please come to the service center. You have a phone call from your mother.”

I was embarrassed and angry. Why would my mother would do something so embarrassing and annoying? Was she really going to do this? And just tell me to pick up some extra milk? Argh!

I arrived at the service desk. I picked up the phone.”

WHAT?!”

My mother tells me, “You forgot you have a hockey game at 6:30pm. You better leave now or you will miss it!”

I played roller hockey for years in Virginia. I missed it. I had recently joined a league in Dayton, Ohio. It meant a lot to me. My mother knew that.

Good memory when I was a teenager: I went to the local grocery store, Meijer (similar to Smith’s or Harmons). I heard my name over the PA system. “Would Aaron Sha-fuh-wall-uff please come to the service center. You have a phone call from your mother.”

I was embarrassed and angry. Why would my mother would do something so embarrassing and annoying? Was she really going to do this? And just tell me to pick up some extra milk? Argh!

I arrived at the service desk. I picked up the phone.

“WHAT?!”

My mother tells me, “You forgot you have a hockey game at 6:30pm. You better leave now or you will miss it!”

I played roller hockey for years in Virginia. I missed it. I had recently joined a league in Dayton, Ohio. It meant a lot to me. My mother knew that.

Four related tight couplings in the New Testament:

1. Baptism and forgiveness. “I baptize you with water for repentance.” (Matthew 3:11) “[John was proclaiming a] baptism of repentance for the forgiveness of sins” (Mark 1:4)

2. Forgiving others and being forgiven. “‘Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.’ … For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” (Matthew 6:12, 14-15)

3. Being merciful and receiving mercy. “Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy.” (Matthew 5:7)

4. Not judging others and not being judged. “Judge not, that you be not judged.” (Matthew 7:1)

The New Testament unpacks these and we learn:

– We forgive others because he first forgave us. “Forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive” (Colossians 3:13)

– “We love because he first loved us.” (1 John 4:19)

– Being saved is not a result of works. “For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast.” (Ephesians 2:8-9)

– We are acquitted and declared righteous by God by faith apart from works. “For we hold that one is justified by faith apart from works of the law.” (Romans 3:28)

– There is something more central to the gospel than baptism. “For Christ did not send me to baptize but to preach the gospel.” (1 Corinthians 1:17)

Christians say: not a contradiction. In all four couplings, one ends up being a manifestation of the other. The coupling is of inevitable inseparability, but the foundation for it all is God’s grace and love.

Paul labors in Romans 9-11 to answer two questions: “[Has] the word of God has failed[?]” (9:6) “Has God rejected his people?” (11:1) He answers these in at least six ways:

1. “Children of the promise” benefit from God’s promises. It is not enough to simply be “children of the flesh.” (9:8) “For not all who are descended from Israel belong to Israel.” (9:6)

2. God has always had a purpose in unconditionally electing individuals *out of* Israel, independent of human decisions. “In order that God’s purpose of election might continue, not because of works but because of him who calls… So then it depends not on human will or exertion, but on God, who has mercy.” (9:12,16)

3. As prophesied, “Israel has stumbled over the stumbling stone,” Christ. How so? “They did not pursue [righteousness] by faith, but as if it were based on works.” (9:32)

4. Israel has heard the message, but stubbornly rejected it (10:14-18). They have rebelled en masse. They have what they need for faith (hearing the word), but still refuse to believe.

5. The salvation of Gentile believers was prophesied. “I have been found by those who did not seek me; I have shown myself to those who did not ask for me.” (10:20) “Those who were not my people I will call ‘my people,’ and her who was not beloved I will call ‘beloved.’” (9:25)

6. God’s plan to eventually save ethnic Israel is roundabout: God has hardened Israel to bring salvation to the Gentiles. When the “fullness of the Gentiles has come in”, the Jews will be jealous, and this will lead to the mass conversion of Israel. In this way, God will save the elect of both Jews and Gentiles, and will fulfill his special promises to ethnic Israel. (Romans 11)

In review:

– God’s word has not failed, but has been fulfilled.
– God’s purpose in unconditional election unstoppably continues.
– God justifies both the Jew and Gentile by faith, not by works.
– God is still fulfilling his plan to bring ethnic Israel to faith.

Paul ends with an overflow of worship: 11:33-36. This God is exhaustible in wisdom. “For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be glory forever. Amen.”

Last updated on March 12, 2018

Mormon leaders Orson Hyde and Joseph F. Smith taught that Jesus was married at the “wedding at Cana in Galilee” in John 2.¹ This is a foolish interpretation for at least ten reasons:

1. John introduces the wedding with a kind of “there happened to be” kind of attitude: “On the third day there was a wedding at Cana in Galilee.” (John 2:1)

2. “And the mother of Jesus was there.” (2:1b) If this was Jesus’ own wedding this statement seems unnecessary.

3. “Jesus also was invited to the wedding with his disciples.” (2:2) This is an odd way to speak of someone’s own wedding. “Jesus, you also are invited to your own wedding. Please RSVP and bring fish.”

4. When the wine ran out Mary tells Jesus, “They have no wine.” (2:3) Not, “We ran out of wine.” Their wedding, not his.

5. Jesus responds, “Woman, what does this have to do with me?” (2:4) It was neither his wedding nor his time to burst onto the scene.

6. When the “master of the feast” tastes the good stuff (the miracle wine), he addresses the bridegroom and celebrates. But John (the narrator) seems to speak of this bridegroom in verses 2:9-10 as someone other than Jesus.

7. After the wedding Jesus takes off with his mom and brothers and disciples. “After [the wedding] he went down to Capernaum, with his mother and his brothers and his disciples, and they stayed there for a few days.” (John 2:12) Is this how Jesus, the perfect man, treats his new wife?

Reasons outside of John 2:

8. On the cross Jesus instructs John to take care of his mother: “Woman, behold, your son!” (John 19:26) No such provision is made for his supposed wife or wives.

9. In Matthew 12:46-50 Jesus reorients the family, not around household life or blood or the nuclear unit, but around unity in doing the will of the Father. All those who do the will of the Father are his mother and brothers. This new, broad, wide, inclusive kingdom family outlasts the nuclear family (Matthew 22:30), which the gospel may even break apart in this life (Matthew 10:34-39).

10. In Matthew 19:11-12 Jesus speaks of celibate singlehood (the life of a “eunuch”) as—at least for some—preferable to marriage.

I hope this encourages you to look closely at the text of Scripture. You don’t need to be a scholar to test these kinds of claims.

“Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who has no need to be ashamed, rightly handling the word of truth.” (2 Timothy 2:15)

¹ http://jod.mrm.org/2/202#210

Further reading

• Did Jesus Christ Marry and Father Children?, by Cky J. Carrigan (January 14, 2017 archive)
• Was Jesus Married?, by Bill McKeever
• Was Jesus Married? A Careful Look at the Real Evidence, by Mark D. Roberts

“…because a thing is eloquently expressed it should not be taken to be as necessarily true; nor because it is uttered with stammering lips should it be supposed false. Nor, again, is it necessarily true because rudely uttered, nor untrue because the language is brilliant. Wisdom and folly both are like meats that are wholesome and unwholesome, and courtly or simple words are like town-made or rustic vessels—both kinds of food may be served in either kind of dish.” – Bonhoeffer, Confessions 5.6.10, Outler Translation

“As we must often swallow wholesome bitters, so we must always avoid unwholesome sweets. But what is better than wholesome sweetness or sweet wholesomeness? For the sweeter we try to make such things, the easier it is to make their wholesomeness serviceable. And so there are writers of the Church who have expounded the Holy Scriptures, not only with wisdom, but with eloquence as well; and there is not more time for the reading of these than is sufficient for those who are studious and at leisure to exhaust them.” – Augustine, On Christian Doctrine

“Anyone who is thirsty will drink water from any utensil, even if it is somewhat inconvenient. And it is better to take some trouble in getting the water pure than to drink polluted water out of a glass. Anyone who is thirsty has always found living water in the Bible itself or in a sermon in fact based on the Bible, even if it were a little out-of-date—and it is an acknowledgment of a dangerous decadence of faith if the question of the relevance of the message, as a methodological question, becomes to loud.” – “The Interpretation of the New Testament,” (Aug 23, 1935) in Dietrich Bonhoeffer: A Testament to Freedom (rev.; eds. Geffrey B. Kelly and F. Burton Nelson; HarperSanFrancisco, 1995), 151.

(HT: Ron Huggins)

I was talking to one of my best friends about how hard and sad the social life for adults begins to be. High school, college, and young adult communities are more spontaneous. In some ways… more thrilling. But then you grow older and have to work hard at community.

You go through a season of married life in a cave. You have young children and suddenly a trip to Target is the highlight of a week. My wife and I have sometimes forgotten what “adult conversations” are like. We sometimes have the kids stay quiet for 5 minutes at the dinner table just so we can have one. We have been so exhausted at the end of a week that it has been hard to enjoy a date. This is worse in seasons where we have let our schedules become too busy. We need margin.
Now we have to plan most of our social encounters — sometimes weeks in advance. A calendar notification pops up: “Breakfast with…” You have to drive 25 minutes to see your friends. Your relationship circles get smaller. This problem is much worse for singles or those in fledgling churches. Or those in areas of the country where friends are more geographically disparate.

Weekly scheduled time together with a few key friends — this is now the rhythm of social life. Occasional dates with my wife and, individually, with my kids. A walk to Dunkin Donuts! A bike ride around the block with a 7-year-old. A playful romp on the living room floor with my 1-year-old. This is gold. Worth more than diamonds.

Friendships that last don’t merely run on the gas of shared context or shared life-seasons or shared boredom. I have friends now that are 30 years older and 15 years younger than me. The local church — especially via non-Sunday-service meetups — is more and more central for communal life and relationship. Computer programming puts me in an amazing community with people that have very different backgrounds — we delight in what we work together on. Hockey connects me with really neat people. And through evangelism I get to meet people from around the world.

I wouldn’t want to go back to any of the earlier seasons. I remember being so afraid of being alone in high school. I wish I could go back in time and tell myself, “Everything is going to be OK. God will take care of you.”

And I should be grateful: my loneliest seasons have been formative for my relationship with God. I cried out to him and he answered. “I am continually with you; you hold my right hand… Whom have I in heaven but you? And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you.” (Psalm 73:23, 25) I remember sweet moments of blasting Though I Feel Alone by Waterdeep in my car.

But there were social and relational perks to youth and young adulthood. One hope I have for the resurrection-community is being able to sit down with friends and say without any urgency, “So, what do you want to do today?”

Nancy Pearcey’s thesis: Secularism’s operating assumptions about human life undergird modern approaches to ethics of the womb, body, sex, marriage, end-of-life, etc. Especially:

• The human body has no identifiable morally significant design or purpose.
• Sex and the body are instrumental to extrinsic goals. They have no deeper meaning or design. Neither are they an intrinsic good.
• Likewise, gender has no meaning, design, or morally significant purpose, and is not an intrinsic good.
• Not every member of the human species of is of equal dignity (i.e. non-person humans).
• In fact, “human” / “humanity” / “species” are mere social constructs.
• Humans are not normatively integrated wholes — body, mind, soul.
• Marriage is a genderless, in-comprehensive union, not at all structured by the design of bodies.

In contrast the Christian worldview holds:

• The human species and its two genders are ontological realities. They are not ultimately fiction, or fantasy, or fabrication. Nor are they merely assigned by culture.
• Being a member of the human species is sufficient for dignity, protection, and value.
• God created our bodies with morally significant design.
• The human body has identifiable purpose.
• The human body is intrinsically valuable.
• Humans are, normatively, integrated wholes.
• Marriage is a comprehensive union of persons “across all dimensions”, complementary, and structured by the design of the body.

---

“Every social practice rests on certain assumptions of what the world is like—on a worldview. When a society accepts the practice, it absorbs the worldview that justifies it… [It] is not merely a matter of private individuals making private choices. It is about deciding which worldview will shape our communal life together.” (Nancy Pearcey, Saving Leonardo, 57)

---

Radiolab episode where blame itself is questioned:

“Neuroscientist David Eagleman… argues for tossing out blame as an old-fashioned, unfair way of thinking about the law. According to David and Amy Phenix, a clinical and forensic psychologist who relies on statistics, it makes more sense to focus on the risk of committing more crimes. But Jad and Robert can’t help wondering whether that’s really a world they want to live in.”

The episode goes on to celebrate forgiveness of blameworthy people.

---

There is a modern schizophrenia around autonomy. It is all-important, yet deconstructed as illusory. Treated as an intrinsic and transcendent good, yet situated in a purposeless and meaningless universe.

If you live in a world where the Vulcan salute is a standard way of expressing good will and salutation, shouldn’t you be eager to do it well instead of dismissing it as “just a social construct”?

Courtesy is a great example of how concern for culture-transcendent categories (love, respect, honor, gender, value) amplifies our concern for social constructs (gestures, colors, symbols, apparel, phrases, tones).

For example: Shaking someone’s hand isn’t inherently courteous. But if you live in America and you want to be courteous, you end up learning to shake another’s hand. You don’t dismiss it with, “Shaking hands is just a social construct.” Instead you say, “What are the culturally appropriate expressions of this culture-transcendent category of human honor and respect?”

I wonder if dismissing such expressions as mere “social constructs” is often a way of dismissing the reality to which the social construct is meant to point. We humans have a way of veiling our complaints about messages with complaints about manners. Maybe we are too arrogant to submit to reasonable standard cultural expressions because we didn’t get to pick them. Maybe we are upset that our identity and culture is largely involuntary.

“When people see or talk about really cool amazing animals, places, stars, etc., and then say, ‘Man, I love science,’ it doesn’t make a lot of sense. Science is a systematic TOOL used by man to know more about our reality. It in and of itself doesn’t create anything. So, it is a lot like hiking up to see a really cool waterfall and after observing it for a while, you say, ‘Man, I love my hiking boots.'” – Travis Howell