Counsel to Young Men

September 29, 2022

Self-control, discipline, and hygiene challenges for young men:

  • 100 push-ups a day for a 100 days, minus Sundays. Spread it out throughout the day. Work up to the daily count if needed.
  • Cut the sugar foo-foo Starbucks drinks. Drink black coffee instead.
  • Reduce the frequency of touching your face. Improve your impulse control. Slow down and use a tissue or napkin with both hands. Not every itch needs to be scratched.
  • Trim your board and maintain a basic haircut. Ask an older man (who isn’t a goofy people-pleaser) if you look disheveled.
  • Replace a graphic tee with a polo or button-up shirt.
  • Fast for two meals, one day a week.
  • Read the job listings for a position you aspire to. What does it require?
  • Spend one evening a week developing your career, e.g. practical new skills, certifications, or training.
  • Gradually turn your shower water colder (mid-shower). Push yourself.
  • Keep your phone outside of your bedroom.
  • Memorize a Bible verse and make it your “fighter” verse against porn, lust, and wandering eyes, e.g. Psalm 119:9 or Philippians 4:8.
  • Memorize a gospel-of-grace passage for when you stumble, e.g. Psalm 51:1-2, or Romans 4:5, or Romans 8:1.

“Likewise, urge the younger men to be self-controlled.” (Titus 2:6)

Added: “Divide allowance or job income into Give/Save/Spend, so you don’t blow it all on frivolous things.” (Josh Pavon)


August 3, 2020

Counsel to young men going to college this Fall:

  • Find a local church that preaches the Bible and become a member.
  • Join a college Christian fellowship. Regularly attend a Bible study. Dive deep.
  • Make friends with people that are different from you. Be hospitable and welcoming to the socially awkward or lowly. That’ll also connect you with other kind people.
  • Think about going on a Summer mission trip to share the gospel.
  • Find a squad of Christian brothers. You don’t need a lot of friends. Just a few good ones.
  • Call your mom on the weekends.
  • Be productive. Treat video games like occasional desserts.
  • Get radical to avoid porn. Use your computer or phone screen out in the open. Install a filter. Turn off the internet at night if necessary.
  • Stay away from secular fraternities.
  • Stay away from drinking parties and drinking games. Being drunk is stupid. A good beer is for meals around trusted, mature friends who keep you in check. Not for the company of fools.
  • Find a mentor, discipler, who will risk offending you and kindly tell you the truth and keep you honest.
  • Be informed via Christian apologetics on the overt historical arguments against the Bible, philosophies that preclude miracles, and subtle attacks (critical theory, standpoint epistemology) on your faith. Find some solid apologists and read their books.
  • Pursue a godly Christian spouse on purpose, intentionally, straightforwardly, and don’t be bashful about it. Be realistic about beauty standards. Don’t date without a bigger mission. Sex is meant to be productive towards raising a godly family in the context of marriage.
  • Pursue a career that’ll help you raise a family. That’s the goal. Having a “passion” for a particular career is great, but keep it in perspective. Take a serious look at the marketplace and the job statistics and typical lifestyle for those with the degree in question.